Originally written sometime between the year 2000 and 2002
I breathe in
And I break down the molecules of your words
Figure the distance of the silences in between
And take what I will of what nurtures
I breathe in
And I begin to write the equation
If factor A is healing, B is safety,
And C is happiness, solve for X
I have the formula and I’m almost there
I breathe in
And anything of significance I take in with breath
Until the air I exhale is of light and color
Pain and fear drip off me like the passing rain
And the orbiting emotions that complete who I am
Will never be shattered again
Breathe in
Exhale
Let go
Release
Breathe in
But the smog in this city is emotional
I stumble over immaculate feet and
Brush against the lips of gods on the
Way to finding the keys to unlock the door
And the only light I see is that which is
Emitted dimly from his window and the
Memory of “this is the beginning of foerver”
Perfection of white blankets on black asphalt
And a kiss softer than the snow that fell around us
So I try to breathe in
And I choke
Still trying to find a way out of this world I built around hid eyes
And create a universe around my heart
So I continue the work
And hold my breath